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From “America’s Finest News Source”: Biden needs balisong practice.

bidenbalisong

From the Onion: Biden loses control of butterfly knife during Commencement speech.

This isn’t the first time the Onion has provided us with blog fodder. While some have said the state of the world has rendered satire obsolete, the Onion continues to blur the line between what is real and what is Memorex. Shotgun Joe Biden is such a walking calamity, it is impossible to rule any potential headline beyond the realm of possibility.

From the Onion:

“COLUMBIA, SC—Advising the 1,500 new graduates to “check out this shit,” Vice President Joe Biden reportedly lost control of his rapidly twirling butterfly knife Saturday while delivering the commencement speech at the University of South Carolina. “Son of a bitch,” said Biden as the butterfly knife slipped from his grip, pinwheeled across the stage, and slid beneath the provost’s seat.”

Apparently, the Vice President does not have the balisong skills of teen star Chloe Moretz. She is 16 in the video below, and has been practicing with fan knives since she was 11. Skip to the :40 mark for her demonstration.

 

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