Question of the Day: What is the worst “Knucklehead Knife Use” you have witnessed?

cookie sheet

Cutting pizza on a cookie sheet with a Shun might be a capital offense. (from Reddit)

I was surfing Reddit on my daily content trawl and saw the above posted by user Durakone. Apparently his knife-challenged sister used his Shun Ultimate Utility Knife to cut a frozen pizza – directly on a cookie sheet. In addition to making me physically cringe, the incident inspired me to ask:

What is the worst act of knife-knuckheadedness you have ever witnessed? Was it by you or someone else?

I certainly qualify for consideration with my little axe incident. I also have four stitches in my index finger from a moment of carelessness back in Scouts, though that was a pretty routine incident.

My mom has a drawer full of kitchen knives, most much nicer than my work-horse Wusthoff Classics. But they are chipped and dull from this abuse. Not that she cooks much anyway.

TTAK Reader Spencer has made his views on batoning abundantly clear. I am sure he is secretly smiling at David’s busting his Benchmade 665 subjecting a fine tool to such unconscionable abuse.

I am sure we have all witnessed countless people prying, beating, chopping, and all sorts of other boneheaded knife acts. What tops your list?

 

comments

  1. jlottmc says:

    When I was a wee Devil Dog, I hadn’t long gotten to my unit, which was a utility section. I was already known to carry a Gerber multi-tool (the old kind that while it would pinch the crap out of your hand, but was actually pretty good). I was asked to barrow it by one of our electricians so they could work on a field hot water heater. Keep in mind this has a stainless steel barrel, and electronics for the diesel ignitor below that. I come back about 30 minutes later to find another electrician frustrated with the electrics on this stabbing the barrel with my knife blade. I promptly took my Gerber back after I was picked up off the deck.

  2. dph says:

    Don’t know if this counts as it involved a hatchet. At Boy Scout camp, Ernie, one of my fellow scouts sharpened a hand axe to a razor edge for some merit badge, the next day he was using the same axe to split kindling wood when he bounced the axe head off of the chopping block and buried it in his calf. The Scoutmaster rushed him off to the hospital about 30 miles away where it took many, many stitches to close the wound and then waited for Ernie’s mother to come pick him up. He was still limping around a month later. I don’t know if he ever got his merit badge.

  3. I_Like_Pie says:

    This is a timely request!

    I was doing some volunteer work over the weekend and a guy in our group was working on something. He asks “Does anyone have a knife?” So I volunteer my spyderco and hand it to him.

    He takes it and starts using it as a screwdriver. I actually said “Jeez man, if you need a screwdriver I would have given you one instead of trying to break my expensive knife.”

    He didn’t understand what I was trying to tell him….Arg.

  4. Spencer says:

    The most common bonehead-knife-owner behavior I encounter is when a blade is “sharpened” on a high-speed grinding wheel.

  5. Sam L. says:

    I recall reading a story about some Scout’s dad taking over a how to use an axe session, and chopping in to his boot. The first aid session immediately following was closely attended to.

  6. Bob G. says:

    I was visiting a relative and was horrified to see him pull out a Puma Bowie out of a drawer and proceed to chip ice with it! He thought it was a junk knife, as he’d bought it for a buck or two in a yard sale.

    Happy ending: I rescued the Bowie, cleaned the rust spots off the blade, and it’s now a cherished knife in my small collection.

  7. Grindstone says:

    Lent my ZT0560 to a coworker to slice up an orange, and when she cleaned the blade with a napkin, she put her thumb along the edge to press the napkin down. Sliced right through the few layers of paper and into her thumb.

  8. Scipio says:

    My wife (now ex), whilst in the process of the divorce, took my Shun Alton’s Angle utility knife and pried open a bunch of home-canned lids with it, breaking off the tip very nicely.

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Question of the Day: What is the worst “Knucklehead Knife Use” you have witnessed?

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