From Duffel Blog: Air Force orders Spencer Stone placed in secure bunker for rest of Enlistment.

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“We have to do everything in our power to protect this kid from sharp objects,” Gen. Mark A. Welsh III (satire)

I just wrapped up the post on Thomas Johnson machete murder, and most other knife news is Knife Intifada related and frankly I don’t have it in me to dive down that rabbit hole tonight. There is so much on that front that I am going to need to post some fresh news soon. I am trying to strike the right balance between giving an incredibly newsworthy knife-related series of events its due without completely bombarding you all. I don’t want it to dominate the blog, but it needs to be covered here.

I guided today, and will be doing so again in the morning, and I really should hit the vise and tie some flies and get some sleep. All of the depressing news is giving me a pretty massive writer’s block. I thought I would put out something to lighten the mood a bit.

Duffel Blog is a satire site, essentially the Onion of the military. They ran this piece on Airman Spencer Stone, hero of the Paris train attack where he almost lost his thumb to a jihadi knife, who was also recently stabbed multiple times outside of a Sacramento bar.

From DuffelBlog:

After he is released from the hospital, Stone will be transported in a Brinks armored truck to a nearby Air Base, which officials have not named in case any disgruntled airmen come out from behind their keyboards and attack him with voodoo dolls. Once his safety is assured at the base, officials say Stone will be transported to Minot, North Dakota, and placed inside a bunker that is being specially-built to house him.

The Air Force plans to bring Stone outside of the bunker at least once per year to get fresh air and give media interviews, though any contact with other humans will be through the use of a room encased in bullet-proof glass.

Read the whole thing. Stay safe everyone.

comments

  1. AW1Ed says:

    And one of the best parts of a DuffelBlog offering is the comments section, where some folks think they’re reading a legit military article, instead of satire.

  2. Grindstone says:

    Wait, seriously? Some airmen got upset because he got promoted to E4? Promotion to E4 is literally nothing. It just means you didn’t get a DUI in the last three years.

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From Duffel Blog: Air Force orders Spencer Stone placed in secure bunker for rest of Enlistment.

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